The Roimata: Compassion, Grief & the Healing Power of Tears
The roimata is a pounamu design of quiet and profound emotional depth. Shaped like a teardrop, it takes its name directly from the Māori word for “tears” — and in that simple form carries one of the most human of all experiences: grief, compassion, and the comfort that flows when one person reaches out to another in their sorrow.
In Māori tradition, tears are not signs of weakness. They are expressions of deep feeling — of love, of loss, of the bonds between people. The roimata honours that understanding, making it a design of great emotional honesty and empathy. It is most often gifted in times of loss or to express deep solidarity. (read more: Gifting Pounamu)
The Meaning of Tears in Māori Culture
In Māori culture, tears (roimata) are a visible expression of aroha — the love and care that binds people together. To weep at a tangi (funeral) is to honour the deceased and demonstrate the depth of the relationship. Tears are not suppressed or considered shameful; they are understood as a natural and necessary part of healing.
The roimata design captures this understanding in stone. It acknowledges that grief is real, that loss matters, and that the act of crying is itself an act of love. Wearing a roimata can be a personal reminder of someone lost — or a gift that says: I see your sorrow, and I stand with you in it.
Meaning: Compassion, Healing and Solidarity
Beyond grief, the roimata also carries the meaning of compassion more broadly — the capacity to feel another person’s pain and respond with warmth. It is associated with healing: the belief that expressing sorrow fully, rather than suppressing it, allows wounds to close and life to continue. (read more: Benefits of Wearing Pounamu)
This makes the roimata one of the most emotionally generous of all pounamu designs. It does not minimise pain or offer false comfort. Instead, it witnesses suffering and responds with presence. A roimata given to someone in grief says clearly: I honour your loss, and I will not ask you to move on before you are ready.
The Roimata as a Gift of Comfort
The roimata is most commonly given at times of bereavement — after the death of a loved one, following a significant loss, or to someone navigating a period of deep grief. It is also given to those who work in caring professions, to acknowledge the emotional weight of the work they carry. A midwife, a counsellor, a hospice nurse — these are people who regularly hold space for others’ pain, and a roimata honours that invisible labour.
In some instances, the roimata is also given to celebrate deep compassion — not in sorrow but in recognition of someone whose capacity for empathy and kindness is exceptional. It becomes in this reading a design of emotional strength, not just emotional pain.
Roimata and Pounamu’s Relationship to Emotion
Pounamu is widely understood in Māori tradition to absorb and hold the energy of its wearer. A roimata worn during a period of grief becomes infused with that experience — not as something negative, but as a record of love and loss that is part of the wearer’s story. Over time, the stone becomes a tāonga (treasure) of deep personal history. (read more: What Is Pounamu?)
The roimata sits alongside the kapeu as one of the more emotionally specific pounamu designs — both have a curved, organic quality that speaks to the inner life rather than outward action. Where the kapeu curves with grace and status, the roimata curves with feeling. (read more: The Kapeu)
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Wearing the Roimata
The roimata is a relatively simple form — a smooth, tapered teardrop — which means the quality of the pounamu itself is especially apparent. A high-quality stone with good colour and translucency makes a roimata that is genuinely beautiful as well as meaningful. It is a design where less is more: the simplicity of the form is part of its emotional clarity.
Choosing a Roimata in Pounamu
The roimata works particularly well in paler stones — īnanga (pale greenstone) or tangiwai — whose translucency echoes the watery quality of tears and the emotional openness the design represents. Darker kawakawa roimata are also beautiful, with a grounded, held quality that speaks to endurance through grief. (read more: Types of Pounamu)
Whatever the stone, the roimata is a genuine act of love when given with care and intention. It says: tears matter, compassion is strength, and I carry your grief with you. (read more: History of Pounamu)
Frequently Asked Questions About the Roimata
What does the roimata mean in pounamu?
The roimata means “tears” in te reo Māori. As a pounamu design, it symbolises compassion, grief, comfort, and healing. It is most often gifted to someone who is grieving, or to acknowledge deep empathy and emotional strength.
When is a roimata an appropriate gift?
The roimata is most commonly given after a bereavement or during a period of grief. It is also appropriate for people in caring professions, for anyone who has experienced significant loss, or for someone whose compassion and empathy you want to honour.
Is the roimata a sad design?
The roimata is not about sadness alone — it is about emotional depth and compassion. In Māori culture, tears are a sign of love and connection, not weakness. The roimata honours the full range of human feeling, including the sorrow that comes from loving deeply.
What stone is best for a roimata pendant?
Pale, translucent stones like īnanga capture the watery, emotional quality of the roimata beautifully. Tangiwai also works well. Darker kawakawa creates a grounded, enduring piece. All types of pounamu make meaningful roimata. (read more: Types of Pounamu)
Can I give a roimata for reasons other than grief?
Yes — while the roimata is most associated with grief and loss, it can also be given to honour compassion, empathy, and emotional intelligence. It is a meaningful design for carers, healers, counsellors, and anyone whose greatest strength is their capacity to feel for others.
How is pounamu said to be affected by grief?
In Māori tradition, pounamu absorbs the energy and experiences of its wearer over time. A piece worn during grief becomes a record of that love and loss — transforming into a deeply personal tāonga that holds the wearer’s story. (read more: Benefits of Wearing Pounamu)